Dead Body Man

July 31, 2017 at 12:33 am (1 Head, Dead Body Man) (, , )

Dead Body Man – 2004 – United States

In the first ten minutes of Dead Body Man, a man pretends to be mentally handicapped and picks up a prostitute. Back at his place, he beats her with a hammer and has sex with her. Then he shoots her, butchers her body while wacky accordion music plays, and sells the meat to a cannibal. The cannibal complains about the meat and says, “Go to a school and get some little girls.” Dead Body Man continues in this vein for ninety more minutes. Each scene struggles to reach a higher level of bad taste but never does.

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Violence Jack

June 4, 2017 at 3:56 am (1 Head, Violence Jack) (, , , , , , )

Violence Jack – 1986/1988/1990 – Japan

The Violence Jack series comprises three anime movies about the grisly exploits of Violence Jack. Jack is a giant man with giant muttonchops who (to quote the narrator) “arbitrarily dispenses death with the razor edge of a jack knife”. He might be a supernatural servant of Hell, but it’s unclear. Japan has been destroyed by a comet, and Jack wanders the post-apocalyptic wasteland chopping up giant bikers, giant mutants, and other Mad Max-style freaks.

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Child Bride

March 21, 2017 at 1:55 am (1 Head, Child Bride) (, , )

Child Bride – 1938 – United States

This film is tasteless and disturbing.

On Thunderhead Mountain in the Ozarks, “back yonder folk” live in rustic squalor. They wear rags and sleep in shacks. Their only fun is to go swimming or drink corn liquor. Their one room schoolhouse has pigeons in the rafters that defecate on the students. It is tradition for the community’s men to marry “young ‘uns” since “there ain’t enough women”. A (comparatively) cosmopolitan teacher moves into town. She campaigns against child marriage and is nearly tarred and feathered for it. One man wants to marry a particular 11-year-old girl. He murders the girl’s father and blackmails her mother until she consents to the marriage. Thankfully, he is shot to death before the marriage can be consummated. Eventually, child marriage is made illegal.

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Manos: The Hands of Fate

October 16, 2016 at 11:51 pm (1 Head, Manos: The Hands of Fate) (, , )

Manos: The Hands of Fate – 1966 – United States

A family gets lost in the Texas desert. After a pointless ten minute driving scene, they reach a ranch. Michael, the man of the family, knocks on the door to ask for help. He meets the satyr-like Torgo who famously claims, “I take care of the house while the Master is away.” Michael insists that he and his family stay the night, even though every other character in the film is against it. Living in the house is a pagan cult. The Master and his many wives conduct rituals to Manos, the “god of primal darkness”. During the night, the family dog is killed by a bigger dog and Michael’s wife is sexually harassed by Torgo. Meanwhile, the Master abuses Torgo (because he grovels pathetically), and the Master’s wives have a big catfight. Eventually, Torgo is massaged (?) to death, Michael’s daughter and wife are married to the Master, and Michael is the Master’s brainwashed slave.

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Mayhem Motel

September 27, 2016 at 1:16 am (1 Head, Mayhem Motel) (, )

Mayhem Motel – 2001- United States

Mayhem Motel
takes place during one night in a sleazy motel. The movie follows various deranged, foul-mouthed, sex-obsessed characters as they try to get laid and occasionally kill each other. In the first 15 minutes, a man carries around a hamper labeled “human organs”, another man vomits while taking a bath (the tub has Easter eggs floating in it, for some reason), and another man gets his crotch shaved by a woman in a Marilyn Monroe costume.

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The Summer of the Massacre

June 5, 2016 at 2:58 am (1 Head, Summer of the Massacre) (, , , )

The Summer of the Massacre – 2004 – England

“Based on real factual occurrences involving a malevolent monster called Hammer Head, whose form of life was cannibalism?” So says the grammatically confused prologue for The Summer of the Massacre. The prologue also describes four “very young teenagers” who are actually college students, one of whom is pregnant. The four drive through the countryside until their “shaggin’ wagon” breaks down. A psycho in a shirt and tie and a Halloween mask stalks them and kills them with a hammer (the small kind—not a sledgehammer). He ties someone to a tree with cellophane. He may or may not be a cannibal.

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Scarlet Fry’s Junkfood Horrorfest

May 31, 2016 at 12:06 am (1 Head, Scarlet Fry's Junkfood Horrorfest) (, , , , , )

Scarlet Fry’s Junkfood Horrorfest – 2007 – United States

Scarlet Fry’s Junkfood Horrorfest is a horror anthology hosted by a hillbilly zombie who makes stupid jokes and chains women to a tree. In the prologue, a desperate junkie beats her dealer to death with a tire iron. She is upset because her dealer gave her a VHS tape of Junkfood Horrorfest instead of drugs. I kind of understand how she feels.

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Las Vegas Bloodbath

May 15, 2016 at 2:45 am (1 Head, Las Vegas Bloodbath) (, , , )

Las Vegas Bloodbath – 1989 – United States

A wealthy businessman comes home to discover his wife sleeping with another man. He shoots the lovers and then drives away in his sports car to find other women to kill. “All women are alike. They just don’t deserve to live.” The killer picks up a prostitute, ties her up, menaces her with his wife’s severed head, and pulls her legs off with his car (which is hard to explain). Next he spies on the Beautiful Ladies of Oil Wrestling (B.L.O.W.) as they have a house party. The ladies drink beer, eat donuts, try on bikinis, play Truth or Dare, and watch their own (lame) oil wrestling match on television. One of the ladies (whom the other ladies do not seem to like) is a pregnant woman with really long fingernails. Eventually, the killer breaks in and kills everyone. The movie ends with him taking a bath in a tub full of body parts.

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Bloodsucking Freaks

March 20, 2016 at 6:09 pm (1 Head, Bloodsucking Freaks) (, , , )

Bloodsucking Freaks – 1976 – United States

Sardu (a sardonic maniac) and Ralphus (a demented dwarf) operate “Sardu’s Theatre of the Macabre” in the SoHo neighborhood of Manhattan. Jaded socialites watch Sardu’s Grand Guignol-style performances without realizing that the torture and murder are real. Sardu runs a white slavery ring, buying and selling young women. Using electroshock conditioning, he brainwashes them into willing slaves who even delightedly torture each other.

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Primitives

November 15, 2015 at 6:48 pm (1 Head, Primitives) (, , , , , )

Primitives – 1980 – Indonesia

“This is a true adventure filmed on location in the jungle where the events portrayed actually took place.” Thus opens Primitives, as Kraftwerk’s “We Are the Robots” inexplicably plays on the soundtrack. In a plot similar to Cannibal Holocaust (1980), three anthropology students trek through the Indonesian jungle to find a lost “cannibal” tribe. They are harassed by poisonous flora and predatory fauna, and are captured by grunting, screaming natives. The natives imprison, abuse, and sexually molest the students until they eventually escape.

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