Scarlet Fry’s Junkfood Horrorfest

May 31, 2016 at 12:06 am (1 Head, Scarlet Fry's Junkfood Horrorfest) (, , , , , )

Scarlet Fry’s Junkfood Horrorfest – 2007 – United States

Scarlet Fry’s Junkfood Horrorfest is a horror anthology hosted by a hillbilly zombie who makes stupid jokes and chains women to a tree. In the prologue, a desperate junkie beats her dealer to death with a tire iron. She is upset because her dealer gave her a VHS tape of Junkfood Horrorfest instead of drugs. I kind of understand how she feels.

Junkfood Horrorfest contains 6 short segments. In the first, a fat cannibal kills a woman and eats her. After his first bite, he yells, “This bitch tastes like shit!” This is a sterling example of Junkfood Horrorfest’s puerile dialogue.

In the second segment, a mean-spirited nurse takes care of a bratty old man at a nursing home. The nurse’s boyfriend arrives with an assault rifle and shoots the man. The nurse and her boyfriend drive away happily.

The third segment is called “Grip Tape Spank”. Some skater punks need money to buy weed. A homosexual man pays them ten dollars to spank his bare ass with their skateboards. After his girlfriend accuses him of being gay, one of the skaters goes crazy. He spanks the homosexual man to death with a nail-studded skateboard. When the skater’s girlfriend continues to make fun of him, he suffocates her with a pillow.

In the fourth segment, a depressed man paces slowly around his apartment. Eventually, he writes a note that says, “To Whom It May Concern: I’m leaving.” Then he gets in the bathtub and slits his wrists.

In the fifth segment, a housewife is abused by her Satanist husband. She shoots him in the middle of a Satanic ritual. By the power of Satan, he comes back to life and pulls her guts out.

In the last segment, a woman gets pregnant by her boyfriend. When he find out, he begins mistreating her. As revenge, she seduces him and chains him up. She sticks needles in his chest, twists his nipples with pliers, sews his mouth shut, and plucks his eyes out.

Junkfood Horrofest is abysmal. The stories are pointless, immature, and offensive. The acting and production are very amateurish. Junkfood Horrorfest is aptly named. Like junk food it is gross, cheap, and has no nutritional value.

Rating: 1/10 Shrunken Heads. Alice Cooper’s daughter Calico Cooper appears in a small role.

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