Concrete Cowboys

August 9, 2013 at 3:02 am (4 Heads, Concrete Cowboys) (, , , , , , )

Concrete Cowboys – 1979 – United States

Concrete Cowboys is a television movie starring Tom Selleck, Morgan Fairchild, and lots of country musicians. It was spun off into a television series of the same name. Despite its inclusion on a DVD called The Convoy Collection (“Hours of 18-Wheel Action!”), Concrete Cowboys is not about truckers at all.

Concrete Cowboys’ title sequence features a country music song over Norman Rockwell-esque paintings of the protagonists. The story follows two saddle tramp buddies. In the first scene, they get into a brawl after accusing a hick sheriff of cheating at cards. The fight evolves into a car chase when the vengeful tramps use a tow truck to tear down a building. On the run, they hop a train to Nashville. After being mistaken for private eyes, the tramps becomes embroiled in a twisting missing persons case involving blackmail, a faked death, and corruption in Nashville’s country music industry.

Concrete Cowboys is well made. The script competently mixes comedy, action, and mystery, and the actors are a good fit for their roles. Selleck is especially charismatic as a contemplative Encyclopedia-reading redneck. However, it is all pretty unimaginative. The characters are one-dimensional, and most of the humor involves the tramps carefree attitudes conflicting with gangsters, cops, and rich people. The most interesting parts deal with the crooked recording industry, but these sinister elements fit poorly with the rest of the movie’s blithe demeanor, and their most seedy details are glossed over.

Ultimately, Concrete Cowboys commits the common sin of being unremarkable. Unless you really dig Tom Selleck or country music from the 70s, there is nothing to see here.

Rating: 4/10 Shrunken Heads. A note for aspiring motion picture producers: Concrete Cowboys has a single scene inside a wax museum. Wax museums are great locations. If you have access to one, shoot your whole movie in there.


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